I have a lot in common
with Clark Kent. Well, not a lot, really. But we have both pulled some identity shifts. Everyone's identity morphs sometimes, to some extent. People might identify themselves with a certain clique in high school, with a profession or a hobby, and/or take pride in an identity as a vegetarian, a fan of a sports team, a resident of a beloved city, proponent of a favorite cause, an expat, a mom or dad. Over the past nine years, my identity, to me, was mostly: mom, then single mom. There have been lots of other components, but that has been the uppermost layer. After O's accident, I was a mom, still, but the 'single' makes a big difference. (Fun fact: In German the expression is not 'single parent,' but 'raising-a-child-alone parent.')
So it feels strange to duck into that phone booth again and essentially adopt
another identity once more. But it is time to do so, because many changes are afoot. I am about to no
longer be a Single mom. I'm starting again - with a
new partner, and even a new baby, due in
76 days (I recommend the "How Far Along Am I?" feature on www.pregnology.com
to all obsessive expectant parents).
What will this new identity be like? Does a newly unsingle mom just fall into a family pattern of "normal" again, just like that "normal" that eluded one during the
nuclear-family-fallen-apart years? Will it be like having PTSD, or having a baby after infertility, which makes one jumpier, more anxious, sensitive and protective than if all had been "normal" all along?
Guess it will be time to update the blog profile soon. I won't be "thirtysomething" much longer, either....
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Lightening up with dark humor... and otherwise breezing through life as a smartassical working mother in a blended family; vegetarian, sometime caregiver to a TBI and spinal injury survivor; American expat; and all-around swell girl.
Friday, July 5, 2013
It's a Bird, It's a Plane, It's a...???
Labels: freakcake
changing identities,
Clark Kent,
patchwork families,
pregnancy,
second children,
single mom,
single parenting,
Superman
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This is gorgeous!
ReplyDeleteOh, what wonderful, wonderful news.
ReplyDeleteThat 76 days should now be closer to 10 if my still addled brain is functioning. hope this catches you before all hell breaks loose ( he he!)
With much admiration, and warm hugs and wishes from an Irish pixie. x x x x
P.S Do keep me posted!
Thanks for this great story of single mom.
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